Meditation...of sorts - My first silent retreat

Meditating or nap? We may never know. (Photo by yischon)

I wrote this while on my first silent retreat. I had done a little meditating for a few minutes at a time, but this was different. It was only for an evening, but different. One of my Quaker friends invited me and I am forever thankful because I'm so used to having noise all the time in the background -- TV, music, even a fan -- something to keep my thoughts at bay. I learned that spending time with myself, in quiet peace, is a good thing, even though it may not always turn out as expected. And I may never finish that rug canvas, but I did start it.

Meditation...of sorts My first silent retreat

Only a few hours.

I concentrate on actually breathing

Something I tend to forget to do

Must be why I sigh and yawn a lot.

Trying to focus on breathing in the pain, breathing out relief

I am successful...for a while

But the mind wanders to various subjects.

That unexpectedly found rug canvas

What will I create with that and stitchy stuff?

Should I apply for that job?

I said I wouldn't go back, but circumstances are different.

Am I a failure if I do? Am I going backward?

Oh yeah, focus on breathing

Try to let those thoughts float by like clouds.

Hmmmm, I can use leftover yarn on that canvas

Create layers on top of it.

Then figure out how to give it a backing

Make it into a wall hanging.

Get it together!

Focus on breathing!

Oooh, and I can add beads and buttons

Some metallic threads

Crochet little things to add on top

Maybe a little crazy quilting...

Finally, I decide that is enough meditating

Move on to working on my crochet project in silence.

My so-called meditation could have been 10 minutes or 30, I don't know.

I do know that it did help me to just be still in the silence.

I also know I will have fun on that rug project.